John R. DiJulius’ book The Relationship Economy, is the focus for the end of this spring semester and the subject of this book review. This book, along with its’ class discussions is one of the most intriguing course-mandated literature I’ve ever read. It has challenged me in so many ways to self-reflect, generate deep discussions with my classmates, and dive into how I have treated the consumer/how I feel as the consumer. The book theme in itself is incredibly interesting. With value not being monetary in a relationship-based economy, but community and communication. The rapport and creative writing, desperately voices for society to stop being so isolated. There is also a priority in the skill of communication. Normal social cues, paired with intentional ways to build relationships are key. One of my favorite segments is Chapter 5: “Meet at Strangers, Leave as Friends.” There are so many informational pieces in this section, from the art of listening, to collecting consumers information through FORD (Family, Occupation, Recreation, Dreams), and even to breaking the ice. In my discussion group, we evaluated our own listening and friendship skills. I realized, I am a very engaged listener when having ‘scheduled’ conversations with people—meaning, at dinners, people’s houses, or time set apart to commune with others. However, when someone starts telling a story or picking my brain, while I was already doing something, I am not such a good listener. I feel like I cannot stop what I was already doing, whether it be homework or cleaning my room, to talk to someone. I try to multitask, and it only leaves me frustrated and usually missing key parts to someone else’s story.
Further, one of my favorite quotes from the entire book is “Never miss a good chance to shut up” – Will Rogers, (DiJulius, 2019, p. 74). I think many of the problems of this world could be cleared up, if we just spoke less. There is so much power in using one’s discernment from a Christian standpoint. Allowing the Holy Spirit to guide us not just to physical decisions, but also when to speak and what to say. One of my favorite works God has been doing in my life is telling me to ‘shhhh.’ Literally in my head if I am about to judge someone else, or chime in on gossip, or speak negatively about myself, I will just go ‘shhhh’. It has been one of the most beneficial things to implement into my life.
One of the other major takeaways I wanted to mention is Chapter 7. On page 132, DiJulius writes, “Only when you’re willing to take 100 percent responsibility for making the relationship work will it work. Otherwise, relationships left to chance will always be vulnerable to disaster” (DiJulius, 2019). This hit me incredibly hard. I absolutely love my family and friends, and one of the biggest fears I have is losing relationships with people if I am not in their proximity. I am not good at staying in contact with old friends, or consistently calling my family from back home. I think this is also important in the Christian worldview. James 4:8 says, “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you” Additionally, Luke 9:23 writes, “And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me” (English Standard Version, 2020). This is so crucial to our faith because God is always with us, but it is our choice to walk with Him or not.
Overall, this book was truly enjoyable. It challenged me in every relationship I had. Put me in the shoes of others. I think every workplace should read it, even if it isn’t a communication or marketing based company.
References
James 4:8. (2020). English Standard Version. Open Bible.
https://www.openbible.info/topics/closer_to_god
DiJulius, J. (2019). The Relationship Economy. Greenleaf Book Group Press.